Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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2 guys are in a bar joking and having a good time. One guy looks to the other and says, "So...HOWS your wife?" The man replies "...She died in a horrible car accident." The man's friend then says "...I am sorry to hear that.." "Yeah I know I wish that God damn rat wasn't in the road goddamn fucker"

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If you are my friend like it!

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Two unemployed Irishmen are out looking for work when they pass a lumberyard. There's a sign outside that said "Tree Fellers Wanted". Sean turns to Patrick and says " What a curious way to write that sign. Surely the term is lumberjack?" "Yes," says Patrick "but what with the current economic situation here in Ireland, I say we get in there, apply for the jobs and hope that our lack of experience is overlooked." "Okay." Says Sean. "And let's not mention the whole sign thing." "No."

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Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

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cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer

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Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause he couldn't afford to pay the gas bill.

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What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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A fat lady walks into a bar. Your probably wondering what she ordered. She ordered a ham burger.

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Bake until golden at 375

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

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What is harder than Jenga? Being a quadraplegic.

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What did Jim say to Bob? Hi Bob.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "How's it going?" The man replies, "Bless you." The man walks out of the bar, as his peers realize he was honest when he told them a week earlier that he had autism.

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What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

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i am an inbred jew who likes penis up my bum ~Nathan Barras

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What did one prisoner on death row say to the other? Can you please clean off the seat when you're done? I'd like to die in my own urine.

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Fuzzy Whuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Whuzzy has no hair. Fuzzy Whuzzy has Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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