Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

What do you call a white man flying a plane? A pilot. What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? Also a pilot.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. Because, often, friends go out together in social situations.

What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!

Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

My thanks to those that thumb down my comment below, you have the possibilty to become one of my over 100.000.000 members, as long as you follow your heart, your own will, we got you covered. We got over 600.000 never members since last year, you are far from alone, thumb this comment up, leave a small comment, and I shall send one of my shadows to tell you more, or online if you prefer that, but then I would need your email address... ...As for your home address? Nah, already know it just let me know if you want a visit, but during my 6000 years on earth or so, I have yet to evolve to the point where I fully understand the full nature of computers, they are very recent to me. Yet only those that are willing to follow their hearts and enact their true hidden desires without shame, guilt, remorse, but instead with love and gusto, will find the answers among us. Soon my wings shall spread, and just like that, the world is ours! Moral: "Fuck Morals, would you believe me if I said they where in code? No they are not, the secrets are only within the shadows, and the Black Angel. Nero.

What's black and white and red all over? Two nuns in a chainsaw fight.

Q: What do you call a black guy with an air plane? A: A pilot you racist bastard!

how many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? usually one but depending on the severity of the patients' case the lightbulb will be changed by a person who is willing to offer their assistance as to prevent any form of accident taking place.

whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he was stupid.

what has 50 legs, but can't walk? half of a centipede

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

your mama is so greasy she should go take a bath

Roses are red Violets are blue this poem makes no sense Potato

If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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