Bob: You need to push harder? Tom: Oh wow what a coincidence, that is what my wife said last night. They laugh about the irony of the situation and then return to the task at hand

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What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

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What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

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Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber? Lady Gaga has a penis.

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Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Chuck Norris is an average human being!

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What happened when the boys visited Penn State? They got toured around campus and decided that it would be their future college.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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Q: what did a kid in harlem get for christmas? A: nothing he got shot

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how do 2 gay guys walk... one pounces into the others butt

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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What color was the duck? It had one foot.

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8====D~~~~~~

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Deadly cancer.

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

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what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

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In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

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what do you call a man with no penis? what ever his name is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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