TOBUSCUS

Why did the chicken cross the road? Idk

What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

Why are females bad drivers? Because it is hard to drive with pots and pans.

I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

a man is running away

Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

What happens when a black man spills all of his grape soda? He cleans it up and recycles the empty can

In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

there is a mexican and a black guy in the back of a car, who is driving? The cop

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you cuz your fat.

What's worse than a Wasp at a picnic? Two wasps at a picnic. What's worse than two wasps at a picnic? A serial rapist. What's worse that a serial rapist? Three wasps at a picnic.

Curiosity killed the cat and was sentenced to prison for animal abuse.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

What did the black man say to the white man? Nothing. He punched him in the face and stole his iPhone.

Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

Q: What did the boy do when his mom asked him to put away his clothes? A: Yes. PS: If that wasn't funny to you, then go f**k off. You clearly don't have any sence of humor and you should see someone about that, like a mental health doctor.

Why did the chicken cross the street? I would rather live in a world a chicken's motives would not be questioned.

What would the world be like without 1 direction it would still be the world but just without 1 direction

How do you get a Blonde to switch seats with you? Ask her politely.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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