Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Did you know Hellen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you find a date? Look on the calendar!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are Red, Blues are Violets, Have I Dyslexia, F**k.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was the blonde sent to prison? Well there could be a number of reasons, but I for one do not know this specific blonde so I can not help you.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

thumb_up thumb_down +18

"My foot is killing me" "no, actually it's that noose around your neck"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the woman start crying? She didn't have woman's rights... That's right, get back in the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why was tommy so sad?............because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why couldn't the the black man get a job? because he doesn't posses the correct work ethic.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

-_- i like trains ... -_-

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A brown haired girl and a blonde girl are driving through a cornfield. Because of this illegal activity, they are sent to court and given 8 years in the state prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

how many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? usually one but depending on the severity of the patients' case the lightbulb will be changed by a person who is willing to offer their assistance as to prevent any form of accident taking place.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

yo mommas so ugly that everyone died.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops