An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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Why wasn't the man talking? Because he was sleeping.

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An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

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What is long and black The unemployment line

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what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

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sally stole a t.v what happend next? she was arested

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Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

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What's the difference between George Michael and a microwave oven? One is a human being and the other is a resourceful appliance.

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Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

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the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

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What is Lil Wayne's first name? Wayne

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

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knock knock. come in.

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Whats worse than a Jew Ben rike

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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Whats worse than purple nurples? Having the period

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What do you call a guy with four heart chambers, two pairs of extremities, and an aortic arch? Anatomically normal.

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

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Why did the old lady cross the road? Why not.

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Q: why id the bird fly away from the boy? A: cuz he was scared

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Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

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A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

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Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

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What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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