What is red,brown and stinks? A deer that's hit by a car

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

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whats worse than finding out you have Alzheimer's? Finding out you have Alzheimer's

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Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

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Person 1: Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide? Person 2: It works very well.

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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Your momma is so white, when she goes out in the sun it is necessary for her to use a lotion with an SPF greater than 30 because she burns easily and is also afraid of skin cancer.

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What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Shut up.

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Poem Of Love: Each time i see you i feel like i need you and i love you.. i hope you became my girl and live with me cause without you i can't live.

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

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Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

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Knock Knock trick or treats? here is the candies, have fun kids!

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Why does one not simply walk into Mordor? Mordor doesn't really exist and thus is physically impossible to walk into, or enter by any means really.

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NASCAR

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What did the officer say to the black man? You're under arrest.

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There was a big guy he was called Mac. So Mc Donalds turned him into a burger

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What do fish and dogs have in common they are both animals

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What did the Batman say to the Joker? "I am the Batman."

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Where do you live? In a house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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