What did the girl get for her birthday? Older.

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Why does Spongebob go to work? Because he's ready.

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A black man walks into a bank with a gun......he is a 25-year veteran SWAT team officer attempting to arrest two armed robbers that have 5 old ladies hostage.

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Yes.

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it lost Consciousness.

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Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

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What happens when Darth Vader farts? Nothing. Darth Vader's butt was burned off on the volcanic planet of Mustafar and he fell into a lava pit. Darth Vader has since started a program called Darth Vader's butt replacement research foundation. Please donate money today. You could be changing a buttless person's life. Thank you very much.

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I had sex with my mother in law

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread, and loaves of bread are incapable of understanding the intricacies of fly-by-wire guidance and propulsion systems.

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

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WHat is worse then Fred singing and cumy condom

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

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Do you really want to know what i shit? Poo

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What do fish and dogs have in common they are both animals

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where wally? wallys a myth.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

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How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

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I was reading this book one time..... and my imagination took me away to many lands and times.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I t was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops