what did the asain have for dinner? A: rice

A man walks into a pet store. He then says "This isn't the bar" and leaves.

What do you call a cow that went through a earth quake? A dead cow.

What do you call a man who eats a swordfish at 11 o'clock? Dead by midnight.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

What did one hostage say to the other hostage? Hrmfhrmfphmfr

Joe: it says gullible on the ceiling Jack: yes, I wrote it -by Ross

Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

what do you call a gay guy Ej

How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

How did the girl with no arms fall out the window? I pushed her.

What did the dying boy get for Christmas? Presents

What's the square root of 6739472? Who gives a f***?

i like turtals and kids

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

pinky ponky went a bit wonky oh no plz dont go or i will rape you untill you know

A blind man walks into the girls bathroom.

What did the Priest say to the Rabbi? Nothing. The Priest was mute and the Rabbi was deaf.

When I walk in the rain, I get wet

Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop.

1 friend request facebook: ignore. Nuff said

Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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