Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

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Why was the man sweating? He was stuck in a burning house.

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Okay, one second.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

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Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

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My nigga so racist he killed a man cause he was white.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

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i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

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What is better than a cat? Nothing

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Why can't men give birth? Because men do not not have the reproductive organs required to give life to a new born child.

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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Q: What did the student say to the teacher? A: The answer is four.

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knock knock ... no one was in

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I am.

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

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Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Fun fact: If you took the skin of an average person and laid it flat you would have enough to get a pretty serious criminal conviction, amirite?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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