Want to hear a joke? Jokes are not allowed on this site. Only anti-jokes.

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

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Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

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Mike tyson

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Usually, the bad (anti) jokes are the ones that don't make you laugh. Sometimes you laugh "with" the joke, other times, you laugh at the joke itself because it is a paragon for human failure. The jokes on this website are not exempt from that rigid stipulation. However, it should be noted that all the "jokes" on this particular website are actually hilarious because of the latter reason delineated in the above paragraph. Additionally, this joke was created by a machine and thus the originator of this work is by no means able to learn from the process of trial and error and therfore can make myriad unfunny jokes without compromise.

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How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

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What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

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Why did the pedophile get arrested? He was driving way over the speed limit.

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if i had a nickel for every time iv typed an anti joke... i would have $0.15

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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A guy trips a blind man.

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What do you call a homeless person with one leg? Rob.

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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A man sees a clown, a robot, and a monkey walking down the street side by side. The man ponders the randomness of life.

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what did the chinese guy say to the black guy? hello

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Q: What is the difference between a Ginger and a shoe? A: A shoe has a sole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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