Why did the jewish man pick up a nickel on the street? Because he understands the value of saving money.

When Kylie and Conner have a baby he will have a centimeter Schmeter!

Knock Knock! Whose there? Adolf Hitler

What do you get when you read a book? More knowledge in your brain.

A straight guy, a straight girl and a bisexual guy walk into a bar. The bisexual guy is twice as likely to find a partner from a purely statistical point of view.

What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

What did the African do when he found out he was constipated? He ate a laxative and went to the toilet

your dad's gay. just let that sink in.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

Whats worse than malaria? Dying from it.

You Know Wats Funny? Jokes....

Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

What did the man without a tongue say...

If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

A very unattractive girl bent over in front of me. I proceeded to be sick, and then I choked on my sick. I died. My family mourn my death every day.

Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says to the other: "Maybe we should rethink our ways of life and realize why animals are on this planet"

What's the worste part about alzheimer's disease? You forgot you have AIDS.

Kenneth kaniff takes his hat off then he meets cosmic panda with kevin the zebra because chuck norris ate a chili pepper.

Where did Ann go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

How do u get a clown off of a swing? You hit him with an axe.

How do you kill a blonde? By inactivating major functions in the body, for example cutting off the blood supply to the brain.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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