giddy goat

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Is that a baby in your carriage or are you just happ..... WTF. WHERES ITS EYES!? **purges**

So a mouse walks into a bar....the bartender immediatly kills it because he doesn't want another C rating by the sanitation department.

Two hunters walk in to the forest. They have a great time ending the lives of defenceless creatures. They go to their respective homes, eat a light dinner, and fall asleep in their beds.

Why was the boy kissing up to his parents? He only wanted them to say "I love you" for once.

But I like being mean and angry! Nevermind, 158 according to Mensa`s standard bullshit test (my wife got 160, I remember we argued a lot over it because I kept insisting they would not use the same predictable pattern again... I overestimated them wildly I can make more advanced stuff than they can, and in no way do I consider myself "The worlds elite required to ensue the future survival and salvation of mankind`s finest and fittest" those fucking arrogant suckers,,,) Below average in any test including American presidents and historical events. Aaand about 450 in any bullshit online test which then offers you "more accurate tests" which cost money and probably destroys the fake confidence any idiot buying such a test in the first place might have built up,

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

What's long, hard, and filled with semen? A submarine

What do you call a black airline pilot? Captain, you big racist.

Q) Why was six afraid of seven? A) Seven was black.

What is 2 + 2? 3 LOL

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

shitted on em put your numbah 2s in the air if ya did it on em

If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

No, luke. I am your father. damnit

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

the WNBA

A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

What did the African-American get for Christmas? Nothing. I did mention he was African-American, right?

What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

A blonde walks into a bar and orders a drink. The end.

Knock Knock! .... Knock Knock! ... There seems to be nobody at home...

what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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