why was the boy laying on the ground? he got shot in the head

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once upon a time there was a boy

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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Chuck Norris is an average human being!

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Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

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why does column have a letter n?

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Why did the man rob a convenience store? Don't ask why, call the police! He could be robbing more stores!

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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What's worse than having AIDS. Being Black.

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What did the blind kid say to his dad Nothing , his dads dead

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What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

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What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

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What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

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What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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What is the difference between a dead baby in a blender and a rock? There are many differences. One of them is the fact that I don't masturbate to a rock.

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Q: Ask me if I read the terms of use before I submitted this joke. A: I didnt

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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What do you call a white woman that had sex with a black guy? A rape victim.

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Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

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what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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