A fat guy runs a marathon. He dies of obesity and dehydration.

thumbs up!

How do u get a baby to stop choking? Take ur c*ck out if its mouth!!!

So a moose walks into a grocery store and asks the clerk, who is a penguin, "Where's the bread?" And the penguin says "On isle three!" But, when the moose gets to isle three... The bread isn't there!

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

Know who had straight parents? Adolf Hitler.

Man: get back in the kitchen! Women: no Man: ok

A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

There is a middle-eastern man in customs with a turban and a briefcase and he is profiled by his race which is a sad fact of our society.

Why was the black man sent to prison? He was wrongfully accused of a crime which is a fine example of how flawed today's justice system is.

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

Why didn't God show up to Jesus' bar mitzvah? Because he doesn't exist.

Yes.

Q: What's small and can't read? A: A candybar

hi

yo momma's so fat she sat on a tiny chair and relaxed.

why is john so fat years of over eating

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: I have no Idea what you would call cheese which isn't yours. However, it seems quite trivial to take time to discuss a nonsensical topic such as cheese which isn't yours.

What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

wood cant chuck wood

Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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