I think I lost my number so can I... No you can't because phone numbers can't be lost

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A man fell off a cliff... He died a vicious death.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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why is santa so jolly? hes not hes a fictional character made up by our parents imagination

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Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

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If you don't see any banners here, it doesn't mean they aren't here.

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Nicholas Salek did not write the message below. It was a joke one of his mates played!!

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs. A pharmisict.

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lets have sex, ok, but itll have to be anal, cuz im a guy xoxox danni

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Know who had straight parents? Adolf Hitler.

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How many 1 ft dwarfs does it take to climb up a 55 ft ladder? Only one. It's just a ladder. All you gotta do is climb up it.

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How much cocaine has Charlie Sheen done? enough to put your health at risk

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Why do they call you the interrup... SHUT UP!

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a man is running away

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What did the man with cancer do? Die

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What did one manicotti say to the other manicotti? I doubt we'll ever know.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's

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What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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Penis.

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What has feet but cannot walk? What has a beak but cannot peck? What has wings but cannot fly? A dead bird.

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What's tan, red, black and brown? Your face. Two days later... In the mausoleum. "Your face"

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Chuck Noris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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