What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

A creationist, an evolutionist, and Neanderthal Man walk into a bar. They order two beers and a glass of red wine. The bartender asks: "Will that be all?". The evolutionist says "Yes"

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

give me thumbs up or i'll rape u to death

You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

Why was the young black boy kicked out of his classroom? Because the manner of his actions were inexcusable.

i have yougurt with tractor

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

Your Momma is so old, she started exercising more and eating healthier to increase the chance of her living long enough to enjoy your own children's lives.

A blonde and a brunette are falling from a cliff. They are going to die.

How do you make a dyke moan? Insert a BEAVER in it!

How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

your mother is so fat that she eats a lot of high fat foods.

What did John say to Trojan? Hi Trojan

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? There was a huge pile of dead babies blocking his path.

How do you know that you tv has been stolen? It's no longer there.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

Knock Knock Who's There?? Its the police your family have died in a tragic road accident

Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

Q: Imagine you are driving a boat, and the wheel falls off. So how many pancakes can you fit in that box? A: None, because the oranges couldn't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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