What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christimas? A: Cancer.

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What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

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Yo momma so fat, she died.

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I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

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25

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So a guy with ADD walks into a... Hey Look! A Chicken!

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Can I ask you a question? You just did

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What's worse than dying? Dying twice.

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you should be a con artist.

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roses are black violets are too im colorblind how about you

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How long did it take azaha to have a shit? Nine months

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What do a grape and an Elephant have in common? For sensitivity to people who suffer from color blindness, this joke has been cancelled.

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why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

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When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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25

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What did the squirrel say to the other squirrel? Squirrels can't talk.

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roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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kyle dosnt question his sexuality

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Why did the black man go to the gym? Because he was severely fat and would live a short life if he didn't lose weight.

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops