a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

what do you call a dead black man? dead

Happy Birthday! Your mom is dead!

Q: Where does charlie sheen shop? A: Winners

YEAH WELL SMELL YOUR BREATH U BELLEND

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had places to be

Tell my wife I died doing what I love... Not her

whats polish and black a polish black person

What's green and looks like a red truck? A green truck.

Guess What! HI!

Is your refrigerator running? If so, you are on drugs, and should see help.

Did you hear about the sale on the toyota cars from japan? if you can get it out of the water its free!

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? My cheese

They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona.

What is 0% sugar, 100% pure, 150% hyperbole, 90% bug-free, has 4815162342 lines of code, autonomous, is awesome, bigger than a breadbox, bread is pain, is bringin' home the bacon, classy, doesn't use the U-word, deja vu, deja vu (oh wait a moment), does barrel rolls doesn't avoid double negatives, doesn't bother with clones, Engage!, Enhanced!, Euclidean!, Excitement!, Exploding creepers, Finally complete!, finger-licking, full of stars, funky LOL, GOTY, Give Us Gordon, Indev, Ingots, and has an End? Minecraft!

What's black and white and red all over? A referee eating a red Popsicle on a hot summers day.

I love results day! for every A* I get 30 pounds! everything else I cut myself.

What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

Leave her alone...

When life gives you lemons....you probably just FOUND lemons...

What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

Why did the kid fall over? He was hit by a car

Nicole: Shove it where the sun don't shine! Katlyn: I'm richer than you! Nicole: Shut your frickin' mouth! Katlyn: You'll be bankrupt! (This conversation was recorded while Nicole and Katlyn were playing Monopoly. They both died in a car accident later that day...)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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