Whats easier to fit in a trunk, babies or concrete bricks? Babies because you can hit them with a pitchfork.

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your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

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Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

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THE GAME

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Whats big, hard, and in my pants? A tumor.

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what's better to a kid than ice cream from an ice cream truck? when you realize the driver was at your house 3 days ago notifying you that he is a convicted pedophile.

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Shit!

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Roses are red. My name is dave. This poem makes no sense. Microwave.

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What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

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A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

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Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

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A short Irish man and a tall German man went skydiving. Both parachutes coincidentally failed to deploy and they died.

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womens rights to vote

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What does a snake and a dog have in common? They are both reptiles but except the dog.

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So three men walk into a bar. One orders a Miller Light, the other orders a Guiness, and the third has a glass of ice water. He was the designated driver.

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Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

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Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say orange? Well, you shouldn't be. I came to inform you your entire family died in a car crash.

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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