what rhymes with sloth? -RaPe-

What did the girl with AIDs receive for her birthday? Unprotected sex

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

what did bob say tothe ugly duckling? your ugly and a duckling

You know what's funny? Clowns.

1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

Knock Knock Not Yet

Q: How did Whitney Houston die? A: Who?

Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

brandon ya twwat

Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

A black man named Lawrence was driving a car that wasn't his at 3 a.m. The car belonged to a drunk friend who asked Lawrence to be the designated driver.

Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

Roses are dead Violets are dead Im a bad gardener

What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.

watashi no namae wa ramune desu

What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

What's the most racist thing ever... Manhattan

What did the Rabbi say to the priest? The holocaust was real and it tore apart my family.

Whats the easiest way to kill a blonde? Shoot her

"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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