Wanna hear a joke? A Republican political activist.

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Little Jimmy has 100 candy bars, and he eats 95 of them. What dies little Jimmy have? Diabetes

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Three women are on an airplane. One's a blonde, one's a redhead, and one's a brunette. Unfortunately, the plane was going to crash and there was nothing they could do but jump out and parachute to safety. So the captain said to each of the three ladies, "You can only take one of your possessions when you parachute out of the plane." The blonde says "I will take my watch becau--" But before she could finish her sentence the plane exploded because the flames on the wing had ignited the fuel tank. No one survived.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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What did the carrot say when it was thrown out of an airplane? Nothing. It's a carrot.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Robin Robin Who? Robin Williams Whoa, too early bro

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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A Man buys a Prius. Hated it.

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When we was Antarctica and it was cold we would huddles arounds a candles. What did we do when it was colder? We lit the candle,

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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Hello

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

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What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

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whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

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"Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's.

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Did you hear about the deer? He had antlers. If antlers where a kind of disease, that would be a pun.

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Another cat joke. You gotta be kitten me.

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What do you call a bus filled with White, Chinese, and Black people? Public transportation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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