I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

Were did Suzie go after the bombing? A: everywere

Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

The bear woke up after his long hibernation of the winter. "Boy, am I hungry!" The bear wandered around and ate some berries. "These blackberries are too bitter and unripe for my taste, I'll go eat something else." He stumbled upon a honeybee hive and took some honey out and ate it. He was swarmed and stung by many of those bees. "That wasn't my favorite batch of honey, I'm still pretty hungry, let me go find some other food. He came across a cabin in the woods. "There maybe some food in there." To some, this was known as the Northern Vermont Massacre. It was a tragic happening. The 7 membered family, the Hernandez family, all died that day. The bear chase all of the adult and children and the house and brutally ate them.

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

An Asian walks out of the library.

The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

Why did the jewish man pick up a nickel on the street? Because he understands the value of saving money.

Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

Why'd the boy fall off his bike? The holocaust

How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family.

How do you kill a retard? Pour gasoline on him and light him on fire.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

Have you heard the joke about the Swedish surgeon who found a frog in his patient's stomach? Yes, you've told me it before.

why did the jew cross the road? the ss was chasing him and his family to kill him so he ran across the street to same his family, he got hit by a truck and his family was killed...

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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