What do you call a penguin in the desert? A penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what is sticky and brown?a stick

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Nippies

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a white woman that had sex with a black guy? A rape victim.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's bad about pushing your friend off a cliff? you can't do it twice

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a black man with a wooden leg? A veteran.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercorse? I have aids

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did Bear Grylls say to the dead whale? Mmmm.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's a Jew's favorite food? You would have to ask on an individual basis because it is unfair to say that all Jew's have the same favorite food

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia ...where am I

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There's my tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats black and crying after 10 minute my wife's eyes when she left the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down -16

this kid named terry was sitting in computer class then he got punched in the face

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the black guy hit his head while walking through a doorway? Because he was tall.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

love is a homeless guy searchin' for treasure in the middle of the rain and finding a bag of gold coins and slowly finding out they're all filled with chocolate and even though he's heartbroken he can't complain cuz he was hungry in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops