what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

What do you get when you read a book? More knowledge in your brain.

Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

There are two monkeys sittingn a bathtub. The first one says, "Scratch my back Mack." The second one says, "That's okay Joe I've got a radio of my own." (laugh like you think it is funny)

How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

In Soviet Russia, millions of innocents died due to the oppression.

How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

why did the jew cross the road? the ss was chasing him and his family to kill him so he ran across the street to same his family, he got hit by a truck and his family was killed...

Q: What do you call Justin Bieber with a penis? A: Darn good plastic surgery.

Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

when a midget takes weed, does he get high or medium???

ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

what the difference between a kettle with a fever and a wooden mallet? I don't remember how the joke ends but your mothers a whore

What is the difference between a girl and a boy? Well, a girl has two x-chromosones but a boy has and X and a Y chromosone.

What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

Why was the baby ant confused? Because his uncles were ants

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...