Mike tyson

what's shaped like a tree? a tree

knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

Your best friend is different from a dead person. The best friend will die if you shoot him in the head but the dead person won't die, he's already dead.

Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

Why did the baby die? Abortion

What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

How to do you kill a blonde? Various methods, most effective of which is firing squad

Straight men can be bronies.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had an extra penis.

Yo mama's so fat, she weighs over 400 pounds.

a 5 year old rapes a pedophile

Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

WUT SMELLS ? my poo

wanna hear a joke? no.

Your mom walked into a bar and got kicked out cause there's no dogs allowed.

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

Why did the jewish man pick up a nickel on the street? Because he understands the value of saving money.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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