do not read this(this is intended to be read)

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Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

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Why is America such a great place to live? It's not North Korea.

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knock knock come back later i'm taking a shower!!!

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What advice did the cat give to the man? Nothing because it's a cat.

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A:Knock Knock, B:Who's There? A:Orange, B:Orange Who? A:Orange Banana.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication.

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Chuck Norris didn't rape yo mama, yo mama raped chuck norris!

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What do you call somebody from Manchester? A twat

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

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I saw a poor man named rich

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

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Yo mamma is so weird most people try to avoid her.

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What I have learned about the Japanese studying video games and anime (read below for more, better studies): Student at school: USING PENN TO TYPU! USING PEN TO TYPU! Teacher: No Susaki San! You must onry yell the name of attakus! You suspension get! Student: JOSH! I CHARRENGE YOU TO MORTAR KOMBAT! Teacher: KAAAAAAAAMEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE! Student: FINAL FRAAAAAAASH! Student and teacher: Locked into energy wave combat for several hours. Teacher: Puh... Lets rather settle this with a round of Shaolin Soccer... Student: VICTOLY! Me: Well I saw a disturbing lot of Japanese people cosplay dressed as zangief... Skinny guys with fake chesthair and red hair that kept posing with their (nonexistent) muscles and yelling RED CYCRONE! Wanting me to take pictures of them... And Japanese lolitas, and blonde girls called Ganguro... Weirdest trip ever... They also kept Looking at Emanuel my (black) friend, and assumed he was my servant... Conclusion: My real trip to Japan was not so different from my above example as one might think...

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Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

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What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

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Who keeps knocking on the wall? My neighbors have sex a lot.

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Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops