You're Adopted.

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A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

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Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

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Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

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What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

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What is worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

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There once was a man from Nantucket But then he moved to Boston and changes his name to "man from Boston"

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What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

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roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

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Have you heard about the Polish hockey team? They're not very good, but what they lack in skills they make up for in enthusiasm and good team spirit.

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69

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roses are red violets are blue bannas are yellow so is my wife

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

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what is cooler than writing an anti joke? killing eveybody who thinks the " my garden is on fire" joke is funny

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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A black man went on the bus and sat down next to a white man. The white man looked up from his magazine and stared at the black man. They then chit-chatted and enjoyed their trip.

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Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

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What do you call a gay couple of kangaroos adopted baby A Joey

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Woman.

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Q: What do you get when you stand a blonde on her head? A: HORSE DICK

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Q. what did the gay man say about the smoothie? A. he said "that is soooo good"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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