Your mom is absolutely pefect. This makes me love HIM.

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I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

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if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

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What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

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theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

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What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

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What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

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What's worse than five babies in one trash can? One baby in five trash cans.

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What's the difference between a water melon and a baby? One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other's just a water melon.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

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You're so fat. Well maybe to kids born in Africa.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

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Why did the black girl and white guy have sex? Because they were both sexually attracted to each other.

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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2 women were sitting quietly

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Why did the man's legs start shaking when he saw the attractive women? There was an earthquake

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

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An asian is driving a car. He observes the speed limit and uses his turning signals while switching lanes.

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What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but Im on bath salts, and you're face looks tasty;)

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What happened to the newlywed couple who couldn't tell the difference between KY jelly and window putty? All their windows fell out.

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I got a dig bick. You that read wrong, You read that wrong too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops