ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

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An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

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what the difference between a kettle with a fever and a wooden mallet? I don't remember how the joke ends but your mothers a whore

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What is the difference between a girl and a boy? Well, a girl has two x-chromosones but a boy has and X and a Y chromosone.

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

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two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

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A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

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Why did the child get cancer? Because there was a family history of it.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, racist.

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knock knock whos there a boy a boy who ? oh, sorry he just got hit by a train.

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex afender

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Why was the baby ant confused? Because his uncles were ants

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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson? I thought you were dead.

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What's better than four dead babies in one trashcan? Nothing. Those babies could have grown up to be new heads of state or even the doctor who discovers the cure for cancer.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!

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Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

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rosses are red voilets are pinkey your mams pussy is really stinky

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Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

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why couldn't the the black man get a job? because he doesn't posses the correct work ethic.

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A blond and a redhead are walking down the street the red head says look a dead bird the blond looks up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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