"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

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A Elephant was going to fight against the biggest and toughest and meanest giant African desert mouse! The battle the animal kingdom had waited for centuries! *DING!* Elephant: Get up Mickey! Mouse: Squish! Disney: How big do you really think a African "giant" desert mouse is?

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What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

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What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

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An Asian fails their maths exam.

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Roses are red Cranberries are tart It sure stinks when you fart

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

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knock knock whos there a boy a boy who ? oh, sorry he just got hit by a train.

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69

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why are the inside of a black mans hand white? cotton residue

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Oh, I must be hearing things.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

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A child rides by his mother on his bicycle and says "Look Mom, no hands!" The child doesn't come back, and night falls but he has yet to come home. His mother calls the police and a search begins 2 days later. He is never found is presumed dead.

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Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

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why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

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Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

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There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

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Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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