There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

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Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four in the seats, twenty six in the ash tray, and thirty in the gas chamber.

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A. Your mamma is so stuiped she starved to death in a grocary store.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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I have Alzheimer. What?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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...this makes a cop throw a car and then call "inception!"

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What would be worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts.

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what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

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Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

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Why do the piglets have their heads down low? Because they are ashamed that their mom is fat.

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hey guys what's up?

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What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

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A: B: No pun intended.

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What did the japanese man say to the other Japanese man? I like your eyes.

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Why couldn't the blonde screw in the light bulb?? - she happened to be autistic

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

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Hey Shea

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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