--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

Obama

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Starving children in africa.

A baby seal walks into a club.

A man see's a bird and tries to get its attention by whistling at it, much like if it were a dog. The mans whistle fails to get the birds attention because birds have wings and dogs do not.

Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" So the horse says, "My ex-wife just got full custody of my kids and I'll never see them again."

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

What happened to the man who posted yet another repeated joke on anti joke? Nothing. He posted an old joke that everyone has seen a form of already.

knock knock who's there aids

2 women were sitting quietly

Q Why did the man run away from his shadow? A He didn't it was physicaly impossible.

Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and oranges? With one,you can make a delicous smoothie, but the other is just a pile of citrus fruits.

What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

wanna hear a joke? asians with t i t s

Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... he didn't

Making a good analogy is like making a chocolate sundae; either way there are simply no reindeer left, and the glass of water you once had is now gone.

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because ie was glued to the other one. why did the third elephant fall out ot the tree? Because he thought it was a game. why did the tree fall? Because there were elephants in it.

What would make a black guy sad? His mom dying on death bed...

Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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