What is the difference between a plum and an elephant? One is purple, and not an elephant.

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How many women's right's leaders does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't change anything.

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why is the name Brian so funny BECAUSE IT IS!

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Clever rhyming punch line refrigerator

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it was a refrigerator. Why did the little girl die? Because she was hit by two monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

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A blonde walks into a bar... Typical

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You have never had sex because.... Well, look in the mirror and you'll see for yourself -Matt

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Black History Month

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why did Sally fall of the swing....she had no arms. knock knock who's there? NOT Sally.....

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ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

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3 friends are out camping. One says to the other "It sure is a great day to go fishing." The other says "Yes indeed." The third one says "I agree." After a few minutes of hiking, they go to lake and begin fishing.

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If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

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Why did the Dentist recommend Oral B? He had been paid by the company and thus legally bound to do so.

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A black guy, a Jew, and a Mexican jump out of a plane. Who dies first? Well, judging by the fact that black people in general have a higher body mass, the black man most likely would smash into the ground first.

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A man using Apple Maps walks into a bar. Or maybe a hospital... or possibly a church.

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Why do Asians squint their eyes? They were born like that.

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They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

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Why do all black people look the same? They don't you're just racist.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was peckish.

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knock knock whos there Aids, now you've got it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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