how long does it take a black woman to shit? 3 to 5 minutes depending on the food she ingested earlier that day

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Q: Why were the chicken and the cow friends? A: Because they shared common interests.

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ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

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why did Sally fall of the swing....she had no arms. knock knock who's there? NOT Sally.....

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Roses are red Violets are blue Clever rhyming punch line refrigerator

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it was a refrigerator. Why did the little girl die? Because she was hit by two monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

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Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

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You have never had sex because.... Well, look in the mirror and you'll see for yourself -Matt

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A blonde walks into a bar... Typical

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Black History Month

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What is the difference between a plum and an elephant? One is purple, and not an elephant.

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why is the name Brian so funny BECAUSE IT IS!

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How many women's right's leaders does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't change anything.

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Why did the Dentist recommend Oral B? He had been paid by the company and thus legally bound to do so.

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A man using Apple Maps walks into a bar. Or maybe a hospital... or possibly a church.

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If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

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3 friends are out camping. One says to the other "It sure is a great day to go fishing." The other says "Yes indeed." The third one says "I agree." After a few minutes of hiking, they go to lake and begin fishing.

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A black guy, a Jew, and a Mexican jump out of a plane. Who dies first? Well, judging by the fact that black people in general have a higher body mass, the black man most likely would smash into the ground first.

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Why do Asians squint their eyes? They were born like that.

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why did Mary fall off the swing? cuz she had no arms ------------------- knock,knock who's there? not Mary

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They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops