Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

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What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

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Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

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If life throws you melons... ouch

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

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What goes up and does not come down? Why the hell ask me.

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Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

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Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

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Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing.

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I had a dream, then i died in it and now i'm dead but who cares, how are you ?

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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Q. have you seen stevie wonders last album? A. neither has he.

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I Have a Black Friend

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tea with milk?

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Bin Laden: dang, these pizza guys are so late, this pizza better be free! door: Ring ring ring.. Bin Laden: yes its finally here!

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Knock, Knock... Who's there? Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

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A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? Dead.

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A jew walks into a bar.... He has a beer and then goes home to his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops