Knock knock Knock knock Knock knock I have outsimers Wait why am i here?

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

A buissnes man walks into a meeting and says hello i'm a buissnesman

Your in a building there's no windows ,doors and a sement floors and u only have a mirror and a table how do you get out You look in the mirror see what u saw take the saw saw the table in half two halfs make a hole clime out the hole

Dude 1: Hey, ya see these coins here? Dude 2: ya, what about em'? Dude 1: would you say you see these pretty often? Dude 2: yup... :/ Dude 1: so would you call them COMMON CENTS!?!?!?!?!

Gauss what ur mama said last night nothing i found her dead

THE GAME

Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

What do blacks and the night have in common? Their both worse than when it's light

George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

Why did the man throw the woman off the cliffe? Tequilla.

What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Being a Japanese person in Hiroshima on this date.August 6, 1945

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven looked angry and had a gun.

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

why did the puppy poop? he had too

What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

Wanna know something funny? Your face

What does a snake and a dog have in common? They are both reptiles but except the dog.

What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...