How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the doctor say to the camel with no hump? You're a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A black man, a jew, and an atheist are on a boat. Suddenly the boat started sinking. A mermaid would only save two of them. who do did she save? Mermaids don't exist. The all died. They were my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: That question doesn't make any sense.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why didn't the woman cook dinner for her husband? She had to work late.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

thumb_up thumb_down +37

There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +37

8

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you get if you cross a banana, a mango, and an apple? A smoothie

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What happened to the lady with cancer?? She got shot!!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man has only two fingers on one hand, and everybody calls him two-fingered Mike. Why? Because his fingers were lost in a tragic accident at birth, and his parents, who were considering calling him Mike, decided to lengthen the name because it seemed appropriate.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Yes!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Statistically speaking, one out if every seven dwarves are unhappy

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Don't you hate it when your reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why are black people good at jumping and white people aren't? That's stereotyping people .... anyone can be good jumping as long as the practice.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops