What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

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what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

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what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

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Where do 4 Mexicans in a car go? In the Car Pool lane.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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Four homosexuals walk into a bar. They notice that there's only one stool left at the bar itself. They sat at a table with four chairs. They had a delightful time.

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A women president

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What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

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A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

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I'm so hot my father calls me son.

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Yo mama's house is so small that she had to get a better job in order to buy a bigger one.

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Q: What time do you see a Chinese dentist? A: Never because China has a flawed healthcare system due to overpopulation. It is a sad and sobering reality of the plight of the Chinese citizens.

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Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

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I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

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what happened to the 4 year old girl who got stuck in the freezer? She froze.

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learn the ropes?

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Oh, I must be hearing things.

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Why did the man climb the mountain? Because he lacked excitement in his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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