Man 1: HEY DUDE! Man 2: Go shoot yourself

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what can't you see but stalks you all day and night? ME!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -6

woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the man not go to church? He was an atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the crippled Nazi say to the Jew? Get in the train.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

26 because if 25 is funnier than 24, 26 should be even funnier right?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A Jewish man walks into a grocery store. He purchases the items he needs and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's green and has wheels? a green car.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your Bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why do black people hate school? because they have to sit and learn like the rest of us for hours on end

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What do you do when your friend tells you he murdered someone? A: Call the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

It was a dark night, I was walking home from the shops in town, The wind was whistling through my damp hair, My spine tingled and i tucked my hands under my stinking pits. I felt like someone was watching me, I walked faster the breath was warm on my kneck i turned around. It was gary glitter he pulled down my pants and gave me the best sucky i ever had. We kissed and i tasted the cheese from my knob. In all garry glitter has a giant knob

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops