why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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You's so ugly you should consider facial reconstruction surgery if it's covered by your insurance.

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Random question: Whats black and white, green, and black and white? Well thought out correct answer: 2 zebras fighting over a pickle

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

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please dislike this or else i will continue writing this, lalalalalalalalalallalalalalallalalalalalalalallaallaalallalalalalalalalalalalalalalaallalalalallalalaallalalalalalallalalalalalallalalalalalalallalalalalalalla

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Me and the wife spent her Birthday in bed, if you know what I mean. We're both severely disabled.

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Michal j. fox has Parkinsons disease. He is tired of losing at jenga

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

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eloise dey.

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Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

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what did the black man eat for dinner? a sandwich

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What do you call a black midget with no legs and has 11 fingers? A human being

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A man walks into a bar. He pulls out a knife, shoots the bar tender, and then kills himself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, he was hit by a car.

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what do you call a football team without players a group of coaches

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how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

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What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family!

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whose better then Sarah, Georgia and ellie NO ONE!!!!

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Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

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Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

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A man with short term memory loss loses his memory every day. His last memory before his accident is the day he escaped this hostpital and murdered a family of five. He continues to do this every day and he is known in Mexico as cincochico.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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