Why was the first name of the boy 'Price'? His parents were Hamsters.

Why did Doctor Who visit Ancient Greece? Because has a time machine and has that ability

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

two nuns were driving in Transylvania when a vampire jumps out in front of their car the first nun said "show it your cross" so the secong got out of the car and yelled Get out of the way you pric!!!!

I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other!

Two bananas are walking down the street. One says, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The other banana says, "Wait a minute, fruit can't talk." The second banana turns into a dove and promptly flies away.

Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

whats the difference between a white kid a nd a puerto rican kid? one smells fine and the other one smells like he walked out of a butcher shop that sells cigars and cheap prostitutes

What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

What's large, green, and pissed off? The dumpster out back

What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

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Whats worse than finding a bad anti-joke on this website? Dieing of Genital Warts

colby doesnt shave

ecks! why zee?

bob saget

What happened when the man stuck his hand in the blender? Nothing, it was turned off.

How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

Why did the baby die? Abortion

Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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