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Roses are red Voilets are blue I have a gun Get in the Van

Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

Once upon a time, I was a Muslim.

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

What did the pimp do to his bitch? He thanked her and rewarded her for her years of dedication and preserverance

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

Heat oven to 375°. Grease 18 regular-size muffin cups (or 12 large size muffins). In bowl, mix butter until creamy. ... Add eggs one at a time, beating after each. Beat in vanilla, baking powder and salt. With spoon, fold in half of flour then half of milk into batter; repeat. Fold in blueberries.

Shotest joke ever... Your dick.

I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

How do you wake up lady gaga? Set an alarm for an appropriate time

What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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I walked into a bar and it hurt because it was metal

Q: What is wrong on many different levels? A: Rape on an elevator.

A: Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights B: Wanna hear another joke? Your sexist beliefs are why your single...

what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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