What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

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Knock Knock Whos there Who Yan Who Yan Who Chow Yan Chow

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Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

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If you rape a prostitute is it shop lifting?

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Where did Sally go during the explosion? Everywhere.

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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

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How did the girl with no arms fall out the window? I pushed her.

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What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

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What's the difference between Izzy and a hobo? Nothing...they both have no job and no friends

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No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

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stevie wonder watched a movie yesterday

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What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

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If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

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Guess who didn't have breakfast this morning? Kids in Africa

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What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

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What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

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What did the African want for breakfast? Ebola cereal

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in a lake? Bob.

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What's black and white and red all over? Colors

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Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven looked angry and had a gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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