What's 9+10? 19

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Roses are red Violets are blue i got one question Screw You

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And so i say to the preist ........... pass the bananas

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

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what's the worst thing ever? reality TV shows and singing contest shows

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

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a horse walks into a bar. what does the bartender say? why is there a horse in my bar.

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What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

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Jews

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Why did Sally eat popcorn? She was watching a movie

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Police Report: A 100 year old man was beaten to death on his centennial birthday. Sources claim to say he was "getting his birthday punches"

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No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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GONNA

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Why did the asian fall over? He had a heart attack.

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25

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What's black, dangerous and sits in a tree ? A crow, with a machine gun !

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain. Chuck promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Why can't a blonde woman drive? because she was shot in both legs and cannot operate the pedals without extreme pain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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