Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

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A guy has cancer. He dies.

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What did the black kid get for his birthday?

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What is 0+0? 0, I am not dumb

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what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

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What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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what did the comedian tell the audience? a joke.

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A man walks into a bar with an ape. The ape defecates on the floor. The bartender ordered them both out.

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Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

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What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

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Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

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whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

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Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

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Blonde: I'm sad. Brunette: Why? Blonde: I walked into a bar just to see my boyfriend having a drink with another woman, Brunette: I'm so sorry,

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What's green and has wheels? Boogers on a skateboard.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hector Hector who? ....I forgot the rest of the joke but your mom is a whore.

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Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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why did the baby cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken -written by sion dafydd jones, uk

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Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fuck in dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops