If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a terrible and painful death on impact.

What is blue and looks like a bucket? A blue bucket

Knock, Knock. Come In.

why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

A woodchuck could chuck wood but a woodchuck couldn't chuck Norris because Norris isn't a type of wood.

How much Cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? A lot!

WNBA

Knock knock Who's there? You're adopted.

Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

A black man, a Mexican man, and an Asian man all walked into a bar. They proceeded to have a good time together as they were celebrating their graduation from medical school.

Yo mama is so hot that she needed to lower the temperature

Let's go burn down an orphanage, what are they gonna do tell their parents?

Why is Billy in a ditch? He stepped on a landmine and was promptly burst into many pieces. The ditch was coincidental.

So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

If I was a regular squirrel, I would be pissed at flying squirrels.

An Ethiopian field worker goes into work one day and finds out he was fired. Agriculture in Ethiopia is bad because it doesn't rain much.

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

Never tell Alzheimer's jokes to old people. They will not remember them.

What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

How could the teacher tell that the student was dead? logic

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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