An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders whiskey. An American enters the same bar. He orders a beer. A blonde Frenchwoman enters the same bar. She says "Gimme whatever the Irisman ordered! Double it! He's cool!" She started talking to the American

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock. Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady who got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an abosolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What goes up and does not come down? Why the hell ask me.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what's the worst thing ever? reality TV shows and singing contest shows

thumb_up thumb_down -12

1. Why did sally fall of the swing? -because she had no arms. 2.Knock Knock -Who's there? Not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do Jews suck? Because they lie, steal money, and start wars.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Nippies

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Nick!" Because he knows him and is not racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There once was a man from Kentucky...then he raped everyone in sight... THE END

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock knock Who's there? A pedofile, get in the van Ok

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did brad pay the sexy looking librarian with a big smile on his face? Becouse brad returned his books to late and had to pay a fine for that. The librarian made a joke about the fact that it was a waste of money to return the books late.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the Filipino man get small condoms? Because he's not black.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops