Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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How do you get a dog to obey your rules?¿¿? Threaten to beat it with a rod!¡!

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69

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

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What does the young boy say to the gay man Hello Jacob, because he was raised to respect and treat gays equally

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Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

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What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

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What did the hooker say to her employer after 1 hour....you owe my $20

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Why did the plane crash? There was a horrible mechanical error that caused the main engines to fail.

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how do you get a taco? Buy one!

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Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

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My penis is small, Just kidding, it's huge.

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Why is Billy in a ditch? He stepped on a landmine and was promptly burst into many pieces. The ditch was coincidental.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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A black man trips and falls down. You help him up and ask him if he needs any help. After a brief friendly talk you both continue on your separate ways.

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why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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