what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Pff, "Axel", you are a fucking amateur, I can convey your fucking message in two lines, and one and a half of those lines would be fucking swearing and insults. I am done with the fucking underground society, it used to be a great place for people to discuss real world matters rather than be blinded by the fucking lies of the media, and yes religion, if you ever worked for me, you know that the fucking bible is a textbook example of every goddamn brain washing technique there is. But if you where ever my allumni, id expect you to use those methods sparringly and only when neccesary. No wonder people consider you a fucking cultist, you use your fucking methods as smoke and mirrors rather than letting "your people" know, and teach them that you just use a bunch of verbal tricks. Mental-ism is not magic, and neither should it be implied to be part of the surreal, while I respect your ideology, you have misused it to acquire power and wealth from those you claim to protect, and while you do convey some good ideals, you are far too arrogant and ignorant for the role you have given yourself. Besides, even if you could protect "your people" as you claim you can, who the fuck is supposed to protect the rest from them?! That is some hard core methods you are abusing "Axel", and you know it, if you claim to be anti religion, then stop using the very same methods they do without teaching people how the methods work first! Moral: Never underestimate me, I enjoy behaving like a jackass, but it does not mean that I am one, as for you, you are a jackass which likes behaving like someone worthy of respect. I am still at the fucking hospital, so if you want some guidelines, speak here, and if you cant send me your contact information so we can chat on a proper phone, I will only have to assume that you are either a coward for not revealing your location to an obviously superior man ...Or... ...that... ...you... Are a fucking coward little bitch that simply keeps on hiding behind the people he claims to protect and shield! Start by admitting that I am far beyond your puny knowledge, and I might throw in a few lines of assistance. Moral 2: You are fucking using horse head network as we speak! I use it for bullshit and "iron manning", you shame the remains of the underground society for using it as means of "encoded messages" and at all!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What has two legs, takes away your money, and causes depression? A Democrat.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A muslim walks into a gay bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Win and Beau have no friends

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So a baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock, knock. *answers door*

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you get 1000 pokemon on to a bus? Pikachu!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the boy tell the girl at recess? An anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

roses are red violets are blue you're an orphan, had to break the news...sorry little fella.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Does pizza sound good for dinner?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Janie miss school today? Because she fell in a well.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Uncle Timmy give to Little John for his birthday? Sodomy.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When life gives you lemons... wait that wont happen

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops